The Shame Blame Fame Game

If you got through childhood and adolescence without a shred of shattering self-doubt, you were likely raised by magical wolves until you were 18 and then accepted directly into Harvard. In my case, it was a level of abandonment followed by no adult putting into context bad behavior by family members, leaving me to assume guilt by association, but it can range from severe physical abuse, to dealing with addiction, to being gifted with the attribution "the not so smart one," ( "I can't do.") or for that matter "the smart one." ("I should do better.").

Now that we have the chance to grow up and out, forces around us try to hold us in that box for their own purposes. Bosses are happy to feed your feelings of inadequacy and pay you less, complainers love to bitch and moan and have company for their misery, "helpers" of all kinds like to help you identify with your negative emotions and bad habits to keep you in their loop. Which of course, drags down your energy even further. As long as we present these buttons to be pushed, we never stop blaming ourselves and believing there is no escape, no healing possible.

The advertising industry has manipulated insecurity and anxiety forever, watch a few commercials and you must conclude that you are smelly, too fat, not enjoying sex and living in a germy home - until you give their client too much money for what they have to offer, and Madison Avenue gets a big fat piece of the action. Even more insidious is a later development, caller "reality" programming.

Flip through the cable guide, if you dare. You will come across a veritable parade of frankly shameful behavior by people who were either somewhat famous for something else (and either broke or greedy or exhibitionists or about-to-be has-beens or why are they doing this?) or, worse, have become famous just for behaving scandalously in front of the camera. And the shows make them all rich which gets them even more media... all because people like you and me watch them.

Illustration by Mark Wiener (1951-2012)


I used to think this is a culture of envy but now I see it as something deeper. They are standing in for the shamed part of each of us, their shouting, bullying and foul mouths are a lullaby, "It's all ok, I am bad too and I am rich and famous! The only sin is not having money, and as long as you can afford cable, I will lull you into submission on your sofa every night."

But is that your highest choice when surrounded by worldwide rampant poverty, racism, sexism exploitation and violence to people and nature? Will Donald Trump make an OK President because he has money? Does all the shame belong with the victims of exploiters and criminals, refugees, and the sick?

Of course not! And it does not belong with you either. We are giving these people a great deal of our money and power without a bit of healing going on for us or anybody else! To my art colleagues, yes, there is a parallel to this in the rampant idolatry of "Art Stars" and their makers, all based on a numbers game, that too many real creators allow to distract them from what is important.

This election and other world events are your wake-up call to become the change, And here is the perfect opportunity to let your selfish inner child play, because the first step in course correction here is making it all about you!

Davidji posted a great piece yesterday about letting go that started me on this train of thought. Check out that and try a meditation, it's the first best way to get in touch with the magic you were born with, before all the conditioning --  the real you! It's a big leap, letting go of our attachments to part of our self-image, but it's so worth it...

Wouldn't it be great to get off the couch and really change the world? And maybe, after along day of being a hero, settle in and watch some quality television for a change...

[Author's Note: Happy Birthday in Spirit, Mark. You loved the media hoopla but always knew when to stop! xox, L]

For a trial intuitive reading contact me at beauartsltd@gmail.com! Namaste...

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